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EDITORIAL April 10, 2000 VNN5829 Comment on this story Responsibility, Commitment And Sex BY SWAMI B.V. TRIPURARI  EDITORIAL, Apr 10 (VNN) — The pleasure in sex is accompanied by a responsibility for those who find it pleasurable, a commitment to one's partner, offspring, progressive spiritual society, and God."Q&A discussion with Swami B.V. Tripurari. Q. Devotional practitioners try hard to control sex desire in order to achieve spiritual purity. The ultimate aim is to go to Krsna's abode. But, alas, sex is also there. However, there, only Krsna is the enjoyer. I am confused by this.
A. There is a principle difference between mundane sex that makes the material world go round, and the spiritual interaction between Krsna and the gopis, that which Goloka is centered on. The former involves satisfying one's material senses. This is called kama. The latter involves satisfying the supra mundane senses of Krsna. This is called prema. Q. Does sex exist in bhakti? If it does, what is its purpose and how is it different from mundane relations of a husband and his wife? A. We must transcend the body and sexual desire to love Krsna in purity. However, sometimes the highest love of Krsna is compared to mundane eroticism in terms of the consuming nature of this kind of love, by which one is overwhelmed. We want to fall in love with God with intensity that a young girl falls in love with a young man. Otherwise, there are no mundane elements in conjugal love of Krsna. Lust is selfish, and love of Krsna selfless. Lust involves satisfying one's sense, whereas love of Krsna involves satisfying the senses of Krsna. Q. I have heard that different gurus have different standards with regard to sexual relations within marriage, some being more restrictive than others. Is this so? And if so, why? A. There may be differences but everyone agrees that sex must be regulated. This sense develops in human life. The only argument is where to draw the line. In the Skanda Purana it is stated that a Vaisnava is one who engages in sex only for procreation. Jiva Goswami cites this verse in Bhakti-sandarbha. Yet in spite of this, I believe there is scope for restricting sexual activity to marital relations (and not to only the act of procreation within marriage), and still remain within the parameters of 'krsnanusilanam,' the dynamic culture of love of Krsna. If the restriction of this act is progressive in terms of moving away from self-centeredness, that is what we are after. Let any particular guru decide on a standard for his or her disciple in pursuit of this principle. Q. Is sex for procreation to be understood as avoiding enjoyment of the act even when performing it? This would seem to me to be extreme and unnatural. A. The idea is that the act of procreation involves greater commitment between man and woman and a sense of greater responsibility and selflessness required for raising children. As householders care for children, so too are they to care for those directly involved in spiritual culture, the celibate students, retired persons, and renunciates. The pleasure in sex is accompanied by a responsibility for those who find it pleasurable, a commitment to one's partner, offspring, progressive spiritual society, and God. Q. What is your opinion on devotees and the surrounding society. Should they renounce it completely or should they live in it? A. The two are not mutually exclusive. Those who renounce the world for monastic life set an example for the worldly. They are also preachers of nama dharma, and thus do much to change the world for the better. Those who live in the world, devotees with families, can also help to change the world by their example. However, living in the world without becoming entangled in it is easier said than done. Most live in the world and are affected by it. This does not, however, mean that they should run to monastic life. It is also difficult to live as a monk or nun. Many do this in name only, as a way of avoiding responsibility. With proper guidance our course can be determined. Whichever approach one is psychologically and spiritually suited for is best. The majority of persons should be encouraged to live responsible family lives with a healthy spirit of renunciation. They should envision their worldly orientation as one by which they can lend financial support to those in need of this, children, elders, and the monastics. Later in life they should enter monastic life and use their acquired wealth and experience to support the preaching of nama dharma. Exceptions to this norm are there, and some young men and women may be suited for monastic life. I was fortunate in this regard. Overall the most important thing for you is good guidance. Q: I read in a recent Sanga that you did not feel that chanting Hari Nama in the streets was a practical way to broadcast the Sankirtana Movement at this time. Could you please elaborate? A. My point was that if people disrespect the kirtana in the streets we would do better to come up with an alternate form of sankirtana, which in the line of Bhaktisiddhanta Saraswati Thakura has many forms of dynamic expression. In the Q&A you mention, I cited the example of Prabhupada, who told us to discontinue sankirtana in the streets of Bombay when people were disrespectful. I think that the internet is perhaps the best venue to broadcast the glories of Krishna to the masses. It is a pity that the internet is being abused so much by devotees who have no power to preach and no taste for Hari katha. Otherwise, let those in whom interest has been awakened visit with devotees and engage in kirtana with some understanding of what it is. Questions or comments may be sent to Q&A http://swami.org, or email sadhusanga@swami.org. [Reprinted with permission from Sanga 4/6/00 http://swami.org] About the Author  Other Stories by this AuthorComment on this story Contact VNN about this storySend this story to a friend
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